Living from Heart

a sacred play in magic, music, story, dream and dance



Our gathering opens in an atmosphere of quiet anticipation. Almost all participants have attended Goddess and/or Ancestors. Tonight’s energies are subtler and stronger. A dazzling selection from Rokia Traore sets the mood. We come together in a circle, taking time to arrive and re-establish the Collective Grail built through Ancestors. We then move our circle slowly clockwise, letting the power of Rokia’s song flow like a current through our bodies, already pushing towards ecstatic reverence.

A Native American piece follows to reconnect with the energy of Ancestors. It elicits a familiar stirring, a longing to evoke Love That Is, through time and by means of it. For those who remember this Flow no explanation is required but we pause anyway, recapping for the sake of awareness to relate our journey to the frame of the Mayan Calendar. This begins at a Point of Creation and tracks the journey of Consciousness through space and time.

Its unfolding is internally structured and happens over nine waves. Each triggers a rate of evolution that is twenty times faster than the one before. We are now approaching the onset of the final wave. This will break in March 2011, triggering yet another time acceleration. It is important to be aware of this and prepare. We focus a virtual time-line that extends from the Point of Creation to the part of Cosmos where we are, each of us a centre of differentiated consciousness engaged in an adventure of existence hosted by planet Earth.

The Flow of Creation happens for us along this timeline, which I diagram. Turning my back on the Point of Creation, I imagine a line extending from it, reaching from behind into the Heart of my Heart (chakra), connecting me into the Flow of Creation. I invite my friends to do the same. Then I play music to evoke great waves of Love that move through this flowering of Creation in space-time. We did our Ancestor work first because, just as we have unresolved patterns of wounding in our personal lives, there are also unresolved patterns of deformation in our collective past.

It was necessary to clear these before calling the Great Wave(s) of Creation directly into our midst. Our Ancestors treatment stopped short of reckoning experiences of this lifetime in our birth families.  The patterns we encountered there recap essential patterns of our soul histories such that, by resolving major issues of our personal lives, we also make gifts of our clarified soul legacy available for expression now. We need to heal core wounds in ourselves before we can align effectively or instruct others how to go about this.

New music starts. We turn our backs on my diagrammed Point of Creation, praying to be drawn in whatever direction we must go. Our souls already know this; so do our bodies as instruments for the expression/perfection of our souls. Setting ego-mediated patterns of conceptual knowing aside, we trust in a combined unitary power of animal grace and spiritual remembering. This works as Beauty always works, beautifully. We build the imagery of being connected via a timeline to a Source from which the Flow of Creation streams into and around us from behind.

Standing squarely in the stream of this Flow, we feel a link between the Heart/Point of Creation and the Heart of our Heart(s). Then, with strong expansive movements supported by new music, we project a pure yang sphere around us, breathing out from the Heart of our Hearts, co-ordinating bold outward gestures with this motion of exhale. The energy of our consciousness goes into projecting and maintaining the sphere. It is solidly established by the time our music ends.

A gentler piece begins, inducing an alternative focus on the emptiness that is created when exhale carries consciousness to the edges of our sphere. We let this outside be for now and focus the pure yin space of no-thing that is always found at our evacuated centre. This posits a central mystery of Goddess creativity which, inherently formless, is forever birthing new form(s). We give expression to this knowing via appropriate gestures and movement patterns. The result is much stillness and frequent cupping of hands before tender Hearts.

Our pure yang edge evokes the protective energies of a Divine Father archetype. This secures a pure yin Divine Mother complement at centre by allowing us to feel safe and become conscious of it. Mozart’s Laudate Dominum starts to play. We become aware again of standing in a Flow of Creation, our expanded Hearts empty and open, letting this music/wave of Divine Child energy pass through (1). Our movement expresses what our souls already know. Inspired, the body as instrument of our soul’s perfection, moves to manifest its ideal form. Kinetic geometry shapes our experience of Flow, bestowing form without remainder. It affords a perfect integrative means so we are confident and bold in physically sculpting all that we now feel.

We then enact this piece a second time, expanding our Heart spheres to encompass the whole room, letting our gestures stretch to touch new edges of experience. Iron gates, already ajar, tumble open as we – formerly trapped in shy traces of old wounds – reach past the edge of our longing to re/claim a new/old freedom to participate and be. This second expansion entails that we are now moving in each other’s Heart(s), a mystery we acknowledge but defer considering.

The energy of today is 8 Eagle, to do with harmony and overview. Ours is now in place. Everyone feels elated and alive. I tell the first stage of the Grail story by way of preparation and winding down, up to the point where Perceval sets off for Camelot, unwittingly to pursue the business of a father he never knew he had. As he turns the first bend away from his mother’s idyllic forest home, she falls down dead of a broken Heart. This marks the end of our beginning.

Love That Grows: Soul Arises in the Dream of God


Music of Infinite Void is already playing next morning when we enter our room. We feel ourselves as latent specks of individuated consciousness within this, shaped by ripples of Divine Intent towards participation in a coming adventure of existence. The Dreaming of our souls towards this end is well under way. The sense of expectation it engenders amplifies as new music sounds, calling our souls out into Creation, honing them for service with respect to Earth. Following this, we manifest as Divine Children walking the Garden of Earth, in essence still, without self-consciousness or guile.

The Garden we know is like the forest idyll of Perceval’s childhood. Like him, we are driven from within to open up and venture out, exploring more and more of this great world in search of unnamed metamorphoses. It is a beautifully delicate, subtly robust process. It carries our Song of Innocence into Experience and Transformation. Even as this happens, however, there is a world beyond our forest in which someone is always making war on someone else. Mayhem follows, and aspirations to dominate and control. Eventually these energies find us.

We dance the music of ‘Duality (Our Wounding)’, knowing that it’s necessary to feel dysfunctional patterns that engendered our Fall. Only thus can they become available for healing. The contrast between the music of our innocence and the harsh violent tones of this new eruption could not be more severe. Early flowers of our guileless blossoming shrivel in recoil, inert and traumatised. We check with apprehension what new winds may be stirring, anxious to avoid exposure.

We learn to look in fearful anticipation outside ourselves, experiencing separation and disorientation. Before, following Heart was a simple matter of respecting intuition. Now, instincts injured and spirits dulled, we answer to prevailing local winds, unable to track the Flow of Creation through brutalities that engulf us, in memory and present time. We grow used to living reactively and forget how it might be to do otherwise by aligning our stricken creativity with a Power that continues to live inside us, unbeknownst.

In the forest still, we have never left Home but no longer feel Home. Our experience is of exile. We long to be Home again. This becomes our Passion. We experience the anguish of our loss through hauntingly poignant music that evokes a falling out of right relationship between feminine and masculine polarities of our being. These primal powers long to marry within and between us. They don’t succeed but such is the intensity of longing our dance promotes that many are crying as its last strains fade. This marks a beginning restoration of Flow.

Love That Reaches Up:  Personal Mother/Goddess Dreaming


We return to find music of the Great Mother playing. In pre-patriarchal times, as recently as 5,000 years ago in many places, Goddess-centred spirituality prevailed on Earth. Women were pre-eminently associated with Mysteries of Creation because of their obvious role in childbirth. The status of Mothers was universally appreciated long before the role of paternity was widely understood, at least by men. It was only with the institutionalisation of conflict – warfare as organising principle of human society – that a platform was created which elevated men to centre-stage, or seemed to. This apparent elevation was secured at the cost of alienation, exile and sundering evoked by our last session.

The archetypal role of Mother is to offer unconditional holding, nurturance and love. This provides a foundation from which children can feel Home in the world. Since conflict entered our experience, however, and with it a ‘Fall’ into separation, women have been wounded as well as men. Their wounding has qualified their conduct as mothers also, preventing them from relaying unconditional love clearly at all times. Their children suffer as a result, experiencing wounds and self-doubt. Such falling has already happened if we even think to ask ‘Mammy, do you love me?’

Having noted the ideal of unconditional love provided by an archetypal mother, we consider next the impact made by ways in which our personal mothers mediated the Mother role in our experience. We play songs to facilitate this. The first, by a woman, conjures the atmosphere of enchantment that arises in a home ruled by mother, whose presence (usually) establishes the emotional tone of a child’s early life. The second is by a man and evokes tensions that arise around issues of individuation and the Fools’ tunics that mothers can run off to prevent their babies from absconding to ‘Camelot’.

Each participant has posted a set of childhood photos on the wall to serve as mirrors during moments of reflection. We view these as we move, letting whatever memories are stirred play into awareness. We then expand our Heart-spheres to admit returning feelings, shaping them towards integration and release by means of our best geometry. Then, recollections in place, we yield to a questing, pulsing music of individuation. This drives us far from our mother’s forest home but no matter how far we journey physically, we feel dogged by a sense of encumbrance, of an unshakeable burden that clings persistently and weighs heavy as awareness grows. Desperately we try to shrug it off and outpace it. Repeatedly we fail. Always the burden catches up.

In the end, we have no choice but to admit and accept it as part of what has been. A new music sounds (‘White Wo/Men Weep’). We move now in a mode of acceptance. This evokes transformation. We acknowledge the hardships and misfortunes of our mothers’ lives, moments of pathos and promise. A wave of compassion breaks in our group. We give shape to renewed awareness of the Sorrow of the World, focused by pictures we continue to review.  Inwardly we weep. A Lake of Tears forms in our midst. We dance on its shores. A pale hand rises out of dark depths, proffering a Sword of Light. Gratefully, spurred by instinct, we accept its gift.

Then, brandishing the Sword to make familiar, we ask that the burden might fall from our shoulders and become instead one which drags on ties from behind. This happens easily for all because our Hearts are open and whole in their request. Still attuned to a frequency of universal compassion, we hold the sword back over our shoulders, wielding it so that it cuts straight through ties that bind us to a burden we have now externalised. Old ties fall away. We are freed to turn and face whatever image of our clinging mother waits.

We approach this waiting figure carefully. Again wielding the sword with infinite compassion, we use it to sever ties where they enter our mother’s body, front and back. We then pass the sword over her, healing all scars associated with these ties. Its blade, moved by the intelligence of light, adjusts itself to contour as required. We next pass the blade over own bodies to secure the same healing in ourselves. We then use it to dissolve all remaining physical traces of the ties. Finally, we tap the sword on the ground. This creates a path of light which our mother is empowered to follow into any dimension according to her needs. We throw our sword into the air. It falls back, point first, into the sheath of our spines.

We bear witness and gather whatever has been left behind as a treasure of our mother’s legacy. This still has a role in serving our creative unfolding. As the process completes, new music begins, drawing us back to times when mother’s mood set the mood for our world. We pass before the shrine of our early images, taking one that best represents our Divine Child into our expanded, open Heart. We then carry her/him forward in a River of Compassion that streams ever more strongly around us, cherishing this renewed presence as integral and intact.

We settle in a soft place, invoking Mother/Goddess to hold us unconditionally, covering ourselves as she fills us with her energy, grace, intelligence and love (2). So held in the arms of Mother-beyond-mother all splits between me and my Divine Child start to heal from my foundation in the Heart of Earth.

Love That Reaches Down: Absent Father, Hidden God


The presence of Mother/Goddess surrounds us everywhere in Nature.  The same is not true of Father/God, whose face remains largely hidden: a spirit wind, invisible, known only through billowing sails and swaying trees, if at all. Inaccessibility makes it hard for many to engage Father energies, a phenomenon which has come to be reflected in psychological profiles of the absent father. We can’t kill what never came alive, despite scars of censure and neglect. There is something aloof, or elusive, about the father, something essentially unavailable. A father can be absent for many reasons: a job, war, mistress, newspaper or just the un-comprehended longing of his dreams.

Despite this, there is a beautiful complementarity between archetypal Father-Mother roles. As we have seen, the Mother’s role is to provide unconditional love, nurturance and holding, setting a secure emotional tone for the primary microcosm of the child’s early experience. The Father’s role is to protect and support this primary sphere and in due course to lead the child out from it, beyond the spell of the Mother into a greater world which becomes known as safe by virtue of his mediation. If this doesn’t happen clearly problems are likely to arise. They often do among modern people. For this reason, we enact the archetypal Father role to instil a sense that is largely missing in our culture and activate awareness that may never have been sparked into life.

We begin by dancing the orbit of an archetypal Father in a clockwise pattern around the Mother’s realm. This is represented by a soft pile of blankets in the place where we were lately held by Goddess. Our music evokes powerfully gentle, unconditionally supportive strength of an archetypal Father. We move to it for several minutes, letting it fill and inspire us. Then people move at will into the maternal core to experience being held by Divine Mother love at the same time as Father’s pure protective energy continues to encircle and protect. When lack has registered and been made good in this way, another beautiful African song of archetypal Fathering is heard.

Here our image is of Father as a trusted visitor to the Mother’s realm, entering at an appropriate time with a view to leading the child out into a greater world. I instigate this by touching people gently to signify the call. Their hunger, supported by exquisite music, does the rest. Most rise eagerly, gratefully clasping the hands of invisible giants. It is profoundly moving to see this imagining so beautifully realised. Nobody has problems finding a way into the world. Almost all move with eyes closed on paths that shift arrested patterns towards completion. As our music ends a benign tenderness prevails. This implies successful evocation of a balanced archetypal pattern, bringing to awareness sets of unfelt expectations associated with it. In the moment, a sense of the essential eclipses whatever happens to have happened in our lives.

In practice, these primary archetypes are rarely so clearly differentiated, much less brought into a balanced, mutually supportive relationship. Rather they are experienced in confusing, unpredictable and sometimes contending modes. We review images we have brought as new music begins, evoking promise, building towards it, faltering, clashing, crashing, dissipating, starting over, yielding glimpses of mystery, beauty, ebbing, flowing, getting lost and found. We dance our stories in the framework of this drama, allowing necessary memories to be stirred, moving them without engagement in the spaciousness of our extended spheres, lending our best geometries to shape and integrate. In this way, chaotic elements are remembered and released.

Knowing that a later session will focus healing of the relationship between our mother-father inputs, we dwell here on dysfunctions of the father role. We review our photos and I propose a story of my imagining, perfectly supported by new music. I am 15 years old, on my way to a city for the first time. Markets ordain that I must join my father there to work. He has been absent for some time but will meet me at the station. I am apprehensive and excited. I have never known anything like scenes that greet me as the train slows on its way in. I scan the teeming platform anxiously for sight of my father. There is no sign. Perhaps he was delayed or is waiting outside?

I rise to get off, having no alternative. Doors open. The crowd surges. Music erupts. I am thrust out into bedlam. My father is nowhere to be seen. Parts of me that long for his presence feel numbed. I am jostled and pressed on to the street. There is still no sign of my father. What place is this? Overwhelmed, I panic and want to cry. I want someone to hold my hand. I want my Daddy but he is nowhere to be seen. I am carried in the throng along a wide road, swept up by its inertia. At last, I slip into an alley. Not knowing where I am, abandoned, I start to cry.

The music shifts. Remembering compassion, I expand my sphere, letting emotions rise and flow. A river moves me as I engage again the Sorrow of the World, once more without identifying. Its momentum bears me on, moving in imagination through less crowded streets of this unfamiliar place. Eventually, I am led to an old deserted square with a dried-up fountain at its centre. There, huddled by its side, I see my father. Approaching slowly, I draw a Sword of Light gently from my spine and use it to sever ties I now see as binding me to this fallen image.

I move closer and use the sword to sever ties and heal wounds that have affected him also. I then heal my own residual scars and dissolve all physical trace of the ties. Next I tap the ground before my father with the blade, rousing him to wakefulness and laying down a track of light for him to follow. I gather whatever he leaves behind as family treasure, symbols of his legacy that will serve my continuing journey. Our group gathers then around the fountain and  intones a prayer: Father this is … / Feel me coming/ Open to receive me/ Acknowledge me as your servant and your child/ Take me deep into the Womb of the One Heart/ I will that Divine Will be done through me (x3)’.

A sublimely gentle piano melody plays over our final words ‘Father fill me with your energy and grace, your intelligence and love’. As we channel our energy signatures with extended arms up to the Heart of Heaven, the voice of a Divine Father is heard. We draw his love down into our circle as ‘God Pours Light’. This is the Love That Reaches Down. Our arms reach outwards and up, extended Grail-like to receive a blessing we have craved for so long. When the music ends, our cups are full to over-flowing. Filled then with energy of the Divine Father, we return to our mirror images, take the Divine Child we once were into our Hearts and lead her/him in confidence out through all the cities of the world.

Love That Reaches Out: Manifold Grail and the Flowering of Life


We receive input from both our parents and the two streams interact. Incompatibility between their styles and directives can become a source of conflict for us, especially early on. Given our innocent expectation of unconditional love, problems caused by our parents’ deformations tend to fall on us like a curse. Sometimes this may even seem necessary to betray our innocence into minefields of experience and further on to necessary paths. In this sequence, we consolidate and integrate effects of earlier healing, evoking Divine Child energies specifically in the process.

We start with ‘Echoes of Before’ as Earth sings to call our soul essence to incarnate in this lifetime. We move to the music of Earth’s calling, offering our best geometries to give form to this awareness and integrate it into our embodied consciousness. Then we walk once more in essence, innocently, exploring as we did in days before our Fall. Our journey continues but now, instead of registering unavoidable patterns of wounding, we sense archetypal Mother-Father energies approaching from our left and right sides respectively.

They surface as a result of earlier healing of relationships with our personal fathers and mothers, whose imprints mediate access to archetypal self-parenting resources. Having clarified these, we are empowered to reconnect with our Divine Child. We dramatise this process of ‘horizontal inner marriage’, responding first to the approach of Father energies on our right and then of the archetypal Mother from our left.  They start to mingle. We facilitate this with bold gestures that fashion a new Grail, drawing fully on our powers of active imagination. Breathing out, we consolidate the outer edges of our sphere while conscious of our tender Hearts striving to go sacred at centre. We end with both hands delicately cupped before our Hearts.

A tender Heart goes sacred when it opens past its sacred wound. This is a mythic symbol that evokes the core betrayal of our innocence, some act of omission or commission that plunged us into duality and separation. Trauma attends its coming. Our Hearts close around numbed memories of this wound. Defensive forms are called into play. We live thereafter from shell-like structures built around our essence. The core of our ego-personalities, these insulate us from the pain of our wounding and expression of our underlying gifts. It is therefore said that behind our sacred wound our sacred gift is found, a ‘genius’ that was born with us into the world.

The nature of our sacred wound is usually deeply unconscious. This doesn’t have to be a problem. Our purpose is simply to release, not understand. We can do so now because our Grail vessels have been strengthened on both (fe/male) sides and we have begun reconnecting with formerly suppressed yearnings of our innermost Heart. To release the defensive barriers that cover our wound is also to release gifts of creativity and expression that were buried with it. Our expanded Grail vessel-spheres are now strong enough to contain such release and effects of transformation that it will certainly induce. We have only to surrender.

New music starts, building from a pulsating, hypnotic rhythm towards a crescendo that finally erupts in shattering screams of primal release. Dams breached, the screams continue until residual blockage starts to move. We give ourselves wholly to this process, continuing to express what was unfelt till we are spent. Vigorous whole-hearted action is the key to effective outcome here, observing without identification the passage of new energies out through our expanded spheres, offering our best geometries to facilitate coherence throughout. After the screaming has passed, our music calms, allowing us to regroup via newly intense sacred movement patterns.

Major transformation occurs quietly at this point. Tenderness arises as a result, and new insight. A music of deep compassion plays. Seekers review their mirror images at will, acknowledging as necessary and fore-given all experiences that have brought us to this awareness, Now, when we stand on the threshold of opening new stories. We deepen further with the music into a profound sense of compassion. Fore-given-ness becomes forgiveness. Vulnerability is safely held at the Heart of our expanded spheres and boldly shaped by the clearest gestures we can muster. A closing track of pure yin quality takes consciousness right into the centre of our sacred Hearts. We stand then in circle, our cupped hands tenderly holding a precious essence that has just been released.

Our Divine Mother invocation (‘Mother this is — ’) raises from below a Love That Reaches Up. Our Divine Father invocation summons from above Love That Reaches Down. These streams meet in Heart, where they mingle and reach out to embellish Cosmos. This ‘vertical marriage’ of Divine Mother/Father energies, empowered by  prior horizontal marrying of Mother/Father archetypes, permits consciousness of our Divine Child to register as such in experience. The blossoming of Divine Love that this signifies also marks the Flowering of a Life.

Love That Reaches Back: Divine (Christ/a) Child in Time


Our previous meditation evokes the ideal of the Divine Child. The purpose of our next session is to anchor this essential sensibility in time, so we can act and experience innocently beyond wounding, despite episodes of individual and collective Fall.

Much of our Divine Child sensibility is lost at birth: to medication, emergency, a difficult labour, rough handling or other factors that may blight our tacit expectation of unconditionally loving welcome. Any ‘curse’ that befalls us in place of expected blessing triggers recoil, so that we aren’t fully born – emotionally or spiritually – into Earth. Our aim now is not to ‘relive’ our actual birthing with a view to making this good but rather to enact a perfect realisation of the calling and deliverance of our Divine Child essence into time. Like the modal tendencies of kinetic geometry, such remembering guides us back into awareness of ideal form.

We begin with a beautifully subtle calling of our soul essence to take part in Earth’s unfolding. This is followed by a specific summons to enter the womb, whereon we slip with immaculate intent into blankets, signifying that our soul will don new robes to resume its love affair with existence. Our next music heralds the onset of birth. It expresses beautifully the spirit of Tao, evoking a sense of being born again of water, without impediment. Our birthing is thus aligned with the Flow of Creation, a perfect example of it, and leaves no trace. All happens easily. Reminded of what was always trying to happen, we experience a sense of being emotionally and spiritually born.

The music changes: we shed our covers, loosening them to signal emergence into infancy. This too is beautifully evoked. We linger on the floor, gathering parts of our soul, ordering them towards complete manifestation on Earth. The next wave propels us into toddlerhood. Trailing the covers of our infancy we rise, tentatively asserting our mute promise towards the world. The next piece sees us escorted into a playground. Our Good Father deposits us safely and stands back, allowing us to proceed in un-violated trust. At first we are transfixed, gazing in wonder at other little beings so like ourselves who know how to behave in this strange place. Then, buoyed by invisible waves of divine intent, we say YES! Lending the instruments of new bodies in service to old will, we plunge once again into Life.

Our music launches into innocence at play, a rousing children’s tune that sets us scampering around the room like the light-filled, unselfconscious animals we always longed to be. There is no containing tides of mirth that we unleash. A quieter piece then calls us back to childish sobriety as we enact an adventure of ducks, frogs, bugs and snakes sharing the same water. Summoned next to a Teddy Bears’ Picnic we adjust to its demands before being thrown headlong into escape velocity by ‘The Typewriter Song’. This sets our Divine Children moving very fast and releases us directly into the music of ‘Duality (Our Wounding)’ from before.

Our opportunity is to dance this in total innocence, responding to it as just another vibration, without preconception or agenda. A fallback is to utilise its raucous tones as a means of disintegrating walls erected by our earlier wounding. In the event, no fallback is required. Everyone roars through in a storm of innocent abandon, leaving adult bodies tired but elated after childish exertion. Another major shake-up has taken place. We slow to let our souls catch up, moving with our finest geometry to music of the Goddess, weaving a new internal order that reflects the impact of all we have opened to and allowed. This process integrates effects of transformation within our renewed, expanded Grail vessels/spheres.

Thus reconfigured, we again call down Divine Father energy to the music of ‘God Pours Light’. The effect in our current state of innocence is ecstatic. When the transmission ends our cups are once more overflowing. We move back to a soft Goddess space, intent on tucking our Divine Children in for the night. Remembering then that we are these children, we lay ourselves down in soft blankets of the Mother’s unconditional love, returned after our necessary journeys, connected above and below, at last fully born on Earth.

We take this comfort into sleep, and dreaming.

Love That Reaches In: Conscious Realignment with Source


Void is without limit and extension in any usual sense. The only word our conceptual systems might reasonably apply is ‘infinite’, which means beyond reckoning. And yet if we imagine a non-mass that is unbounded, empty and yet teeming with potential, we begin to understand the Gnostic sense of God as ‘an intelligible sphere whose centre is everywhere and circumference nowhere’. Every point of an infinite sphere is its centre, or Heart. The Void is thus All Heart, or One Heart.

We need a mytho-poetic language of metaphor to evoke and invoke transcendental dimensions of experience, a realm of Mystery which eludes our powers of analysis and description. Even ‘Divine Father’ is a metaphor-based personification of pure yang energy. This pours into existence via the ‘Great Central Sun’, which is also a metaphorical evocation of the ‘Heart of Creation’, another metaphor which secretes the further metaphor of a ‘Big Bang’, behind which lies the ‘Heart of Void’, which is All Heart because its centre is everywhere in an un-manifest kind of way (3).

People who don’t grasp metaphorical values take symbolic language literally and see only non-sense imposed by their limiting projections. Despite this, mythic language remains intuitively compelling because of analogical resonances between it and what it seeks to evoke. It doesn’t claim to tell us what things are but rather what non-things are like (just as ‘gods’ evoke distinguishable cosmic powers). We respond intuitively because we are formed by trans-rational awareness and moved by trans-rational powers. This is especially true regarding no-thing at the Heart of Creation-Void because the same arrangement is replicated in the Heart of our own Hearts.


Our morning scene is set by a beautiful Kim Rosen/Jami Sieber treatment of Rilke’s ‘Before the Beginning’: God speaks to each of us before we are made/ then walks with us out of the night …. This mytho-poetic evocation of our passage out of Void into existence establishes a perfect platform for our sequence ‘Love That Reaches In’, which makes the reverse journey in a bid to realign consciously with Source. As our session title implies, we undertake this as an inner journey.

We start by reviewing my diagrammed Point of Creation as the visible Source from which all arises. We then face away, imagining the timeline that connects us back to this Source. We focus attention in our Hearts, expand our spheres and recite an opening prayer: ‘Spirit take me deeper, deeper and deeper into my Heart, take me right back in through the Point of Creation’. Powerful music starts to play. We turn through 180 degrees within the inner space of our expanded spheres and are ready to begin a journey in Consciousness back through the Point of Creation. Nobody experiences the slightest difficulty or hesitation in complying. This is an empirical fact of great significance.

‘Wizard goes backwards’ marks the early stages of an inner journey which reverses the apparent direction of our development through time. We turn away from current circumstances of our lives and move deeper and deeper back through stages of our soul’s unfolding. Eyes close unbidden. A careful geometry of outer motion arises to chart our passage through newly envisaged inner landscapes. We pass into the realm of dream reflections, tending always towards the Heart of our Heart. Moving through, we hear the Song of our Soul, faintly at first and then with greater clarity.

Continuing, we engage archetypal levels of experience. As always, we integrate and lend form by giving our best geometries to the encounter. This provides a transitional structure required to bridge between waking consciousness and experiences of altered states which are now being triggered. Again, there is no reluctance or trepidation. On the contrary, this sequence clearly engages a wave of deep yearning which is rarely, if ever, fulfilled. The process intensifies as we leave the archetypal realm behind and begin our approach to the level of soul essence.

We are drawn into an access corridor and funnelled through it, coming ever closer to the Heart of our Heart. This is also the Point of Creation. See it as a translucent portal if you will. We continue our approach, drawing ever nearer until eventually we step through. The same music continues. A similar environment is found on the other side (4).  Unwittingly, we are moving still in the circuitry of our stories, bound by inertia even as we probe with heightened sensitivity for an opening that will take us through.

Then suddenly the music stops, our sphere dissolves and we pass as if through a trap door into the Heart of Void. This is no-thing. Here there is only Breath, the motion of pure Spirit/Consciousness, exhale-inhale, summoning worlds out to and back from existence. I breathe in and I breathe out this Breath of God, ever more intimately, intensely. I become this all-consuming, all-pervading meditation, this extravagance of No-thing. It fills me until there is no me but only Breath. I become the Breath of God. I AM the Breath of God, a pattern remodelled in awareness so that even as our physical transmission fades, I AM left breathing in and out from the Heart of my Heart/Creation/Void …

… until the Song of my Soul starts to sound again and I find myself moved to resume its colours, slowly, as new music ordains. Continuing to breathe in and out the Breath of God, knowing I am that I AM, I spiral inexorably back towards the threshold Point of Creation. There, my soul essence rewoven, new music propels me back along an exit corridor, momentum gradually building as I go, breathing deeply still the Breath of God. 

A staggering crescendo peaks as I step back into existence, realising this as something projected from the Heart of my Heart and contained within its re-expanded sphere. Empowered now by the tangible force of all Creation, I sculpt a Beauty Way back along the timeline of Consciousness-in-existence, knowing I AM THAT I AM and also that I Can. A gentler music follows, drawing us back into agreed co-ordinates of our time, place and assigned identities. After careful grounding, we take a break.

Love That Reaches Through: Conscious Co-Creation from Source


A new challenge presents on our return. A half hour ago, this room was filled with the Flow of Creation and we all felt profoundly connected to it. Then the session ended, as our entire play soon will. We went outside and resumed the practice of our usual identities, which inclines us to forget. Where now is our realisation of Flow and what is our relationship to it? The purpose of this session is to re-enter Flow consciously and engage it with awareness, such that we may become permanently empowered to undertake conscious co-creation from Source.

We begin by connecting again into the Heart of Earth (Mother this is — ), sending an energetic cord from our Heart down to its centre, asking in turn for Mother’s energy and grace, intelligence and love. Thus grounded, supported and inspired, we find our way tentatively into the energy of a new wave evoked by new music. We offer it our best geometry, building relationship. Moving always with strong feet, conscious of our Earth connection, we ease ourselves back into the Flow of Creation, surrendering and stretching out on waves that come to bear us Home.

This element of trusting goes up a notch when our next piece begins. It has a strong Flow quality and calls us to yield our bodies radically to its expression, allowing it to bend and shape them as it will. Co-operating consciously, we give visible form to an energy that could otherwise only be heard. This is a first feat of conscious co-creation. It arises as we make One with our music in Flow. There is nothing tentative about it. The first thing we must co-create is a relationship with the Flow of Creation. We are starting to develop this now.

Our next music is more syncopated, almost staccato. It warrants conscious effort to bend our bodies to its rhythms. This brings our third chakra ego-will into the picture, challenging it to align with the force of our music much as a rodeo rider might focus to stay on a wild horse. After a short bout of specific concentration, the pattern is modelled in awareness and dancers are freed to improvise with renewed abandon and delight. There is a strong, palpably empowering lesson here about committing our ego energy to surf pressing waves and co-create beauty through conscious alignment.

We next open an inner passage from our Solar Plexus to Heart, drawing energy up at the same time as we expand our spheres and re-imagine a direct line back to the Heart of Creation, sensing a Flow that streams forward through us from this Source. Our music has qualities of stillness, intensity and compassion. All suit perfectly. Mindful of our expanded Hearts and connectedness into Earth, we call on the Flow of Creation to move through us: Spirit touch me at the centre of my Heart, let me feel the Breath of God rising through me, carrying Divine Love into the world.

Essential conditions for conscious co-creation are now satisfied: we are connected to Source, through which energy of Pure Creation enters existence; we have clarified our souls and opened our Hearts, and we have connected into the Heart of Earth, whence the energy of manifestation arises in 3D. We must now practise bringing all together.

It is exciting to feel a confluence of powerful forces streaming into right relationship as we proceed. We hold all strands in awareness, binding them via geometric form-building and focused intent. Our next step is to heat things up by shifting to music of a higher frequency while remembering to stay clear, expanded, grounded and open. We manage to do this, generating lots of energy and striking forms-in-motion, conscious still that our primary co-creation is always an appropriate relationship to the Flow of Creation. As before, our dancing makes this tangible, giving it shape, coherence and direction. Then the question arises: ‘What will I co-create?’

We are past a point of imposing conditioned ego-agendas. Our souls know what our purpose-passion-freedom-creativity-gift is so we refer the question to them by means of ‘Whole Body Prayer’. This sculpts our longing into a passionate plea for inspiration. We entrust our pleading to the mirror of existence. Our ancestors lend their support. We are left in a state of high awareness, pregnant with anticipation and resolve.

Love That Is (More): The Impossible Transcendence of I AM


The Grail is generally regarded as a vessel but wherever there is a Cup of Love, there is always a Sword of Light nearby. This is the role of Excalibur in the Arthur stories. Our culture has forgotten how to reckon Chalice and Blade in the same Breath but the second is actually a refinement, a one-pointed application, of the first. Together they constitute a dynamically balanced symbolism of fe/male integration. Perceval’s Fool becomes a mighty warrior and, in our Mother sequence, no-one balks at raising a Sword of Light once the Lake of Tears has formed. This coupling has immediate archetypal purchase once it is authentically engaged, but it is also easy to forget.

Thus we begin our final session by viewing Mayda del Valle’s Youtube declamation of her up-beat, hip-hop, spit-fire tsunami of a poem ‘The Gift’. Immediately before, I played laid-back Grail vessel music. This amplified a still-building sense of creative energies gathering benignly in the Chalice of our room. Mayda cuts like a laser through the unfocused benevolence of our dancers as they wait in trust for whatever our grand conclusion is to be. She is revved up, switched on, one-pointed and NOW, a tempest roaring in the Eye of a Storm. Sometimes she feels geometric, she says, so her poems go off on tangents but she never does. Like Rumi, she knows that straying maps the Path; so now will our re-activated company.

We address the process of ‘switching on’, raising our spirits, our ‘light’, for essential expression. This undertaking began unannounced at ‘The Goddess Rising’ – the first in a series of three sacred plays – when we raised the Sacred Flame of Earth up from her core into our Hearts. This Flame burns steadfastly in the Sacred Heart of every awakened wo/man. It signifies the Flowering of Life within a different imaginal stream. Yesterday’s example of the Divine Child’s expanding Heart is an intuitively accessible condensation of a precise track within the sacred geometry of unfolding life. Esoterically, however, the Flower of Life also refers to a Flame of Pure Consciousness that burns at the core of every living thing.

In human terms, we translate this as the vital spark of Spirit which is born into Earth with us but usually gets buried under emotional debris from our current lifetimes and cumulative soul histories. By virtue of the preparation we have made, our group is now poised to raise this spark into our Heart(s), to feel it ignite there and expand into a New Sun of Greater Consciousness and let it shine fearlessly into the world.  We aim to achieve an irreversible ‘switching on’ of consciousness after which our lives will never be the same.  Still fired by Mayda’s ebullience, our dancers make ready.

We start with our Mother invocation (‘Mother this is — ’), this time visualising Earth’s Sacred Flame awaiting us at her centre and drawing it up via our etheric cord with the words ‘Fill me with your energy and grace, your intelligence and love’ (5).  What follows is essentially a pointed repetition of the ‘(Re)Entering/Engaging Flow’ sequence which we rehearsed earlier this morning, so it is possible now to focus novel elements. Raising Earth’s Flame amidst a tide of Passion has the effect of igniting our own Spirit fire, which we fan alive, illuminating our Base chakra through this first phase of our dance. As the physical music draws to a close, we model its patterns in awareness and continue moving with them, re-opening with extended energy fingers a path up to our sacral centres.

New music plays as Passion starts to rise, carrying our Spirit flame. This music is of Flow. It stimulates an Orange surge that empowers us to glide easily, acknowledging the manufactured polarities of our conceptual systems without beguilement and expressing underlying Unity through the seamless transitions of its dance. Forms carved in geometric bliss propose templates for a new humanity, here being dreamt ecstatically alive. Our cup(s) run over.

Again as music fades we model its patterns inwardly and sustain them into silence, clearing again with extended fingers a broad track up to our Solar Plexus. Our spirit flame leaps urgently this time, joyfully rekindling the light of an Inner Sun. New music sounds, mildly syncopated, warranting effortful focusing of ego energies on the discipline of entering/engaging Flow and riding its waves until effective union is achieved. Flourishes of individual genius can now be expressed, unselfconsciously, beyond all memory of forcing or being forced.

Orange mingling with illuminated Yellow turns to Gold. Riding a whirlwind, our bodies open, unreflective and unashamed. Our gestures are boldly expressive, tending towards flight. Our Inner Sun lifts spontaneously towards Heart. We clear a channel upwards as the music fades, into the chamber of our spiritual Heart and expand this as a raw, sublimely elevating music starts to play. Our Inner Sun rises, ascending to fill this expanded chamber with Golden-Yellow light. Our spirit flame leaps fast to burn brightly at the centre of illuminated Heart. We dance this alchemy without effort, in joy. The music swells and we expand our Heart spheres a second time, until they encompass the room. We are now dancing in each other’s Heart(s). Mysteries of Many-in-Oneness begin to unfold.

Our music jumps to new heights of impassioned evocation. Forming a circle, we raise a Collective Sun out of the room and hold it over the building. We then relay it via a power of focused intent into the Heart of our physical Sun. We stand firmly on Earth, still grounded, enveloped in the Gold of co-extensive personal suns, connected now via subtle threads of yearning that run from our Hearts to the Heart of our renewed physical sun. By this means we engage in an ardent Sun-dance, bloodless but alive with longing and prayers for right relationship between a New Sun and a New Earth.

Later, as our music fades, we maintain the force of this longing, focused on the Flame of Pure Consciousness that burns now at the centre of our expanded, illuminated Hearts. Suddenly we are re-minded, thrust back into the Heart of Void, where no-thing is except the Breath of God directly known. Breathing it again, becoming it, we also breathe in and out the Pure Flame of Illuminated Consciousness, imprinting an indelible awareness of it at the centre of (our) Being. This feels like a miracle and is compounded when it gives way to the same poignantly triumphal music which this morning swept us from the Heart of Void back on to highways of existence.

It resounds again, familiar but unknown with regard to Fires of Life which burn now in our illuminated sphere(s). Earlier we achieved awareness of the Breath of God outside the flow of time; now it has been reactivated while we are still in existence. We didn’t go anywhere to find it. Instead we find that the Heart of Creation/Void is actually in us all the time, all through time. This is an awakening. We mark it as our triumphal music swells towards its impossible crescendo – building, building, building till it peaks and we raise our voices in emulation of its thunderous report: we are alive, switched on, response-able Creators, dreamers of worlds and embellishers of Cosmos.

Sounding, we engage the creative promise of our throats, by means of which Divine Will happens through us. Exhaling, we send flames of pure awareness crashing up through our pineal, enlightening even our minds that Consciousness has now arrived. Something has changed for ever. We continue to re-imprint this awareness as we project worlds that rise and fall in our Hearts, breathing out and in the Breath of God, remembering a genius fire that was born towards Earth when we answered a call to existence that issued long ago in the Dream of God.

This music fades and new music begins, reinforcing our awareness of moving in the Heart of a New Sun of enlightened Consciousness. We respond as we have learned, by shaping the experience beautifully, offering our best geometries to lend form, make beauty and make One. Again our solar energies, powerful and sublime, make indelible impressions. We are not meant to be the same afterwards but awakened, enlightened, turned on. As our sublime procession reaches a point of unbearable intensity, the wave breaks. Torrents of driving, pulsating energy release, feeding our latent careers as Warriors of Light, equipping us with all the Fire-power needed for whatever our declamations are to be.

When it ends we are soaring still, conscious in a swirling bowl of pure creative intent, Chalice and Sword equally available, awake. Our next gathering relates these powers to an imminent, culminating wave of Creation ordained by the Mayan calendar.


(1) Every child is a Divine Child (of Cosmos/God/dess). This is a mythological symbol that cannot be discounted, notwithstanding a tendency among wounded people to experience literally. When a Divine Child becomes aware of her/himself as such, s/he becomes a spiritual adult, conscious of being an expression of Eternal Being in time and connected to All That Is.

(2) The basic prayer is: Mother this is — / Feel me coming/ Open to receive me/ Acknowledge me as your servant and your child/ Take me deep into the Heart of your Womb / I will that Divine Will be done through me (x3).

(3) Our language has evolved to fit the physical domain of space-time. It can’t be applied directly to what is meta-physical, behind or beyond the manifold of existence, without creating problems that we usually aren’t aware of. Our best recourse is conscious metaphor. This is a staple of esoteric language across traditions and partly explains why mystics ‘know’ beyond the relativities of wording.

(4) In the event of their personal stories taking a different turn, participants are free to follow their own course and check back later. This rarely happens and almost never poses a problem outside the scope of routine facilitation.

(5) There is nothing hallucinatory about this ‘grounding’ link. It is an energetic construct of focused intentional consciousness, opening on the far side of reflexive entrapment. Earth’s answer is just an intelligent response within a (re)unified energy-consciousness field made whole by our release from fear and resumption of love.

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